Day 4

December 12, 2010

Day 4 at site

Its about noon. I was awoken (or awaken...I dunno. I can't speak english anymore) this morning at about 7 by Miguel (the empregado) bringing my water for me to take a bath. Since I like to take a bath on my own accord, and since I know he's probably going to bring me more bathwater at about 5pm, I used that hot water to clean my tub and my toilet. And by "tub" I mean the little porcelain area I have with a drain where I take my bucket bath. After that, I laid in bed again. Mornings are usually rough for me in this whole "adjusting to site" process. Everyone is going through it, and everyone handles it differently. Next week will be different, because next week I have to actually be in the office at 8, so I won't have time to sit and think. But so far, mornings are when I have time to lay in bed and reflect. Everyday brings something new, and everyday is different from the last. That is equally exciting and scary. Lately, I've spent my mornings laying in bed thinking about what the day might bring, what my friends are doing at their sites, what my family is doing at home, how much I miss Namaacha, how far away I am from everyone else, etc etc. this morning was the same, and then Miguel knocked on my door with my breakfast.

After I ate, still feeling guilty that these people are feeding me when I should be feeding myself, I grabbed a book and started reading. A little while later, just as the loneliness was starting to set in some more, Miguel knocked on my door and told me that someone was here to see me. It was the nurse from the organization I work with. I wrapped a capulana around my waist and walked outside (capulanas are these fabrics that women wear. You tie it around your waist, like a skirt. Its pretty much an all purpose fabric...essential to any Mozambican woman. It can also be used to tie your baby on your back, as a towel, to clean, to go out, to wrap things to carry, etc etc) She just came to check in and see how I was feeling and we sat outside under the lime tree and talked. It was really nice having someone to talk to. She's an older woman, probably in her 60s. She said she had been wondering how I was feeling and adjusting, and she knows that being in the house alone, I was likely "thinking too much", so she came to get my mind off of things for a bit. Just what I needed. We talked about all kinds of things. She asked me lots of questions about America.

I told her the women don't wear capulanas.

"The women don't wear capulanas?? Well what do they wear? Dresses?"
"Yeah, or pants, or shorts, or skirts. It depends"
"Even the older women?"
"Yes, even older women"

She asked about the type of food we eat in America:

"You don't eat xima in America???"
"No, we don't eat xima"
"Well what do you eat? Rice?"
"Yes, we have rice"
"Potatoes?"
"Yes, we have potatoes"
"But no xima?."
"Nope"

(I find it funny that people in this part of mozambique think the only options are xima, rice, potatoes, or pasta...)

She was shocked to hear that people couldn't marry until they were 18. She told me that here, girls marry as young as 11 or 12. I remember having this same conversation in Namaacha with a language professor who agreed that 11 year olds were still children. The culture is completely different in the north. When I told her that my mother was 29 when she had me, she exclaimed "29!! There are women here who have grandchildren at that age!". She went on to explain that a lot of times, when people can't even afford to feed their children, its easier for them to marry them off. At least they'll be taken care of and fed.

She asked if I was allowed to marry a Mozambican. I told her I could if I wanted to, but I'm here to work, not to get married. She asked if my parents would be upset. I told her probably not, its not like they have much control over who I choose to marry..... I hope she isn't a part of the "let's marry off that American girl" committee that I feel is forming....she did make the comment that I was pretty and fat and would therefore make a good wife and good strong babies....then I told her I didn't want children. To which she replied "you have to. You have to have 1 boy and 1 girl, so they can help your mother around the house"

Guess she's got it all planned out.

We talked about rituals where they take boys out to the mato to be circumcised, and girls to be educated about life. I told her that boys are just circumsized in the hospital when they're born in the States. She said that's also an option here, it just depends on how traditional the parents are.

Its so interesting here...there's the people that live in the middle of the town, who use the ATM and drive the motorcycles and go to the discoteca and live the more modern life....and then there's the people who live on the outskirts...who live the "mato" life, grow their own food, live in simple houses with no electricity.... Everyday I get to see both sides of life.

Like most people here, she was shocked to hear that I am my mothers only child and my father only had 3 children, total. I explained to her that a lot of people choose not to have many children, because its expensive and more people take advantage of ways to control pregnancy. I also explained to her that a lot of times, people who are more educated have less children, much like in Mozambique.

She was shocked to hear that people don't really work in the fields and grow their own food...we just buy it from supermarkets.

"What about the poor people?"
"Well, there are some poor people that receive money or food from the government to help them take care of their children"
"They don't just work in the field and grow food?"
"Well...a lot of places, especially cities, don't have space for fields"
"But the poor people outside of the cities grow their own food in their own fields, right?"
"Well...no. Not very many people grow food."
"Is the soil bad?"
"Um..."

That part was kinda confusing for the both of us. I tried to explain to her that there are poor people, and some people are on welfare, some live on the streets...but the concept of poverty in America, and what it is here, is COMPLETELY different. Our conversation made me think a lot about privilege, and how my little two room house with a tin roof and a tiny dark bathroom seemed "nice" to her, since she lives in a house with only 1 room. As I told her that every house in America had pipes for running water, and even if someone can't pay the bill, their house is still wired for electricity, and people just buy food, they don't have to grow it, and the US imports all types of food from all types of places, I thought more and more of privilege, and even the disparities I was reading about between south Mozambique and northern Mozambique.

Anyway, it was nice to talk to someone and practice my Portuguese. As I type, the lizard that lives in my room (I'm naming him Paco) came out and ate something that was buzzing about.

Thank goodness for Paco.

And thank goodness I'm safe under my mosquito net.