Y'know...that really grinds my gears...

January 21, 2011

Living in Mozambique isn't all beaches and mangos and fun times. Some parts of living in Mozambique have been....downright annoying.

Of course, everything on this list is a normal part of everyday life...so I have no choice but to get over it. But anyway, here are 10 things that are currently grinding my gears...

1.)Chapas
- I've touched on the chapa experience in previous blog posts before, but last Friday's chapa trip was...well....it almost sent me over the edge...

I left my house at 11am and after a nice stroll through my neighborhood, arrived at the chapa stop at about 1120. I immediately saw a chapa turning towards the direction I was heading. They asked where I was headed. I told them Lichinga. I hopped on. I was kind of shocked, because the chapa wasn't full at all. This actually might be a comfortable ride...

Who was I kidding?

The chapa (like a mini-bus) is made for 15 people. I counted the seats. But we sure drove around...and waited....until it was packed with 22 people, 3 babies, and a chicken that I was afraid was going to start pecking at my feet. Did I mention that we didn't leave until 1255pm? Yeah...over an hour on the chapa, not going anywhere, because they didn't want to leave until it was "full"....all so they could make as much money as possible. It was hot. People were annoyed. Especially me.

Oh, and chapas aren't made for people over 5'7, so my knee was jammed into the seat frame in front of me, and during the entire ride, my legs were numb. And the woman to my right had nowhere to put her arm, so she put it around me...and was kind of caressing me the entire trip...and the woman to my left fell asleep on my cleavage. And the guy behind me decided to lean forward, and fell asleep with his head between my shoulder blades. And the baby in the back was hot and crying. And the road to Lichinga is only paved in random spots (and I don't think the shocks/struts on that chapa were any good) so the ride was bumpy and painful. And the chicken under the seat in front of me kept freaking out every 20 minutes...

Thank God it didn't peck my feet....


2.)People talking too low
- I'm quite aware that I am a loud, obnoxious, rude American. I can't help it, its in my nature. So maybe this is why I am annoyed, but people talk ENTIRELY TOO LOW. I don't get it. when addressing a room full of people, why aren't you projecting?? Its hard for me, because Portuguese is not my first language, so I need people to speak loudly and clearly so I can understand what they're saying....I find myself all the time wanting to yell "SPEAK UP!!". Ugh....people can yell things on the street to each other, but can't speak up at a meeting.

3.)The sun
- Yes, it is summertime in Mozambique. And its not that its hot...its that the sun is 7 inches from your face at 10am. In the shade, its usually nice. There's a breeze...its not too bad. But the sun here is oppressive and cruel. If it would just go away, life would be easier. And I wouldn't have this weird, awkward tan (and tan lines) that I now have to deal with...

4.)Mud
- mozambican summer=rainy season. The only time you find relief from the sun is when its raining. And when it rains, it gets REALLY muddy, REALLY quickly. Something about this mud...its different from regular mud. Its sticky and slippery at the same time. It sticks to your clothes and shoes and if you step on it the wrong way, you go sliding. And apparently I'm the only person who slips in the mud. I have yet to see anyone else slide...my shoes are always covered in mud....and then when I wash them, it rains again

Its a never ending cycle.

5.)Men
- most men are cool. But I'm just tired of refusing marriage offers and men staring at me drooling with their tongues hanging out.

6.)People on bikes
- I have never liked people on bikes. It was one of the most annoying things about Chicago and its the same here too...people on bikes think they get the same rights as drivers, and they don't. They want to ride on pathways where people walk, and demand the right of way. They whip around corners without warning and almost run you over, and then want to pretend its your fault...

7.)Crianzas
- or children. Kids. You know how I feel about them already. But in Mozambique, they are EVERYWHERE. They run in my yard and steal my mangos. They never say anything when I try to say hi to them. And the other day I found one playing in the corn my landlord had soaking outside. Why she decided to take a bath in the corn, I have no idea. Why he had corn soaking outside, I have no idea either...

8.)Greetings
-back to me being a rude American. If I greet a group of people with a "hello everybody", shouldn't that be sufficient? Why do I have to greet everyone individually? And why are the greetings so long and extensive?

9.)Unreliable phone networks
-my network was out for 2wks. I'm still not over that.

10.)Stereo systems
-the problem isn't the fact that the music starts blaring through the neighborhood at 6am and doesn't stop until 2am. I have earplugs for that. The problem is the fact that the SAME 5 songs are played over and over and over again. I know I can't be the only person annoyed by this. if I could find the exact house and give them a monthly mix cd...just so they would switch it up a bit....